This Post is Scientifical
I don’t know what it is about many men that makes them so sure they’re always right in all matters involving broad scientific principles. By the same token, I don’t know what it is that makes so many smart women defer to their judgement (note correct spelling) even when it’s obviously full of shit.
Of course, I’m over-generalizing here, but as a broad pattern, it does hold true.
What prompted me to write about this are the recent hot temperatures we’ve had here, and the three – count ’em, three – separate conversations/debates I’ve had with three different men regarding the relatively simple concept of how to cool down the interior of a car that’s been parked in full sun all day. All three of these men insisted that the best way to cool the car off is to get in, crank it, and turn the a/c to full blast while leaving the windows completely rolled up.
This is retarded, so if you’re a man (or a woman) who suffers from this delusion, let me explain the reasons why:
- A car that’s been parked in full sun all day is going to be at least 20 degrees hotter on the inside than the broiling temperature outside.
- The hotter something is, the longer it takes to cool it down, unless you’re Mr. Freeze. Your car’s a/c unit is not Mr. Freeze; like all a/c units, it can at most effect and maintain a temperature differential of around 20 degrees.
- The initial blast of air that comes out of an auto a/c unit when it is turned on is also going to be at least 20 degrees hotter than the outside air, for the simple reason that the air blasting out has been sitting in the blower ducts under the hood and baking all day.
- Given #2 above, does it make more sense to expect the a/c to cool the car interior down to a reasonable 80 degrees more quickly if it’s working to cool down air that’s 120 degrees, or if it’s working to cool down air that’s 100 degrees?
Those are the broad principles involved. Clearly, we’re going to have better results if we get in the car, crank the a/c and roll the windows down so the a/c can blow the hotter air out of the car before trying to actually cool it down. The added benefit being that the air that’s been baking in the supply ducts under the hood all day can also escape.
Here’s another dumbass thing one of the guys told me: you get quicker cooling by not only leaving the windows up, but by setting the a/c to “recirculate” immediately. Again, see #2 above. Recirculating 120 degree air, rather than putting the a/c unit to work on cooling down 100 degree air pulled from outside just means you’re more likely to get sweaty balls before the car reaches a reasonable temperature. Because I don’t have balls, at least not the actual kind, I can only imagine what it feels like when they sweat – but I imagine that it’s not pleasant. So don’t do boneheaded shit like setting the a/c to “recirculate” right away.
This last bit I can’t prove, but it stands on solid logic and from my experience, it seems to work: after letting the a/c run a minute with the windows all the way down to blow the hotter air out of the car, roll the windows up about halfway. As the car begins to cool, roll them up further. The cooler air sinks; as it displaces the hotter air in the car (which rises), the hotter air can escape through the partially-open windows. Once the car is noticeably cooler at chest level, roll the windows all the way up; after another minute or so you can set the a/c to recirculate and it will actually do some good.
Consider this a public service. And ladies, those of you who have to deal with a husband or significant other who insists on making you cook in a 120 degree car interior while the a/c unit struggles to lower the temperature to the refreshing 100 degrees it is outside – and I know some of you do have to deal with this – sit him down and have him read this post.
Either that, or continue to deal with the pungent aroma of ball sweat.