Have You Ever Driven a Car That Wipes Your Ass With the Softest Silk Imaginable?
Stupid ads generally don’t inspire much in the way of comment; they are both too common and too unremarkable to, well, remark upon. But this one is so over-the-top that I notice it every time it comes on:
“Pure silver dust hand-polished into the wood?” WTF? I mean, WTFF?
Next up from Infiniti: a car that anticipates your sneezes, and deploys a fine linen handkerchief hand-woven by Indian street urchins; a car that senses hemorrhoids and pops up a donut in the seat to ease discomfort; a car that dispenses birth control when it detects the weight of two human bodies lying in prone position in the back seat; a car that detects bad smells and activates a pleasant masking scent through the climate control system to protect your delicate olfactory organs from even momentary offense.
Most people look at this kind of crap and think, “meh, stupid but ultimately harmless.” I, on the other hand, look at stuff like this and think, “here’s another example of why the human race deserves extinction.”